Title: Sex & The Church IV
Synopsis: The seedy side of church and its virile young men out to get laid.
Disclaimer:
The following
contains some Christian scenes written in a Christianly way.
All characters
appearing in this work are Christians.
Any resemblance to
persons living or dead is a miracle.
List of Characters:
Jason Loh –
resident glutton
Goh Xin Yuen –
resident rapist
Alan – Alabama Man
Melinda – soap
opera villainess
Steven – cell
warden
Kuantan Nurse –
fresh meat 1#
Micha – fresh meat
2#
Alice –
gossipmonger 1#
Helen –
gossipmonger 2#
Pastor Daniel Ho –
the pontiff
Chapter 4: A Toxic Dinner
Much like the Moonies or Mormons, the Damansara Utama Methodist Church encouraged romantic liaisons between members of their congregation. Eligible bachelors and bachelorettes would flock together in a monthly OkCupid ritual gathering which was held on the pretext of youth fellowship. Before I realized it, I had agreed to go on a movie date with the proud lion. What followed next was an exotic Japanese dinner laced with
poison. The puffer
fish, an adorable sea creature which resembled a balloon with pins, was
notorious for killing hundreds in Japan over the decades. Yet I found myself
enjoying this venomous delicacy with Xin Yuen on a Saturday evening. He had skipped his friend’s wedding dinner and arrived in a formal suit, looking
especially smart and professional. I was clad in a body-hugging, snow-white
dress which was flattering on my lithe and svelte figure. We had chosen to dine
in Yuzu, a cozy venue located
somewhere in The Garden. The restaurant was quite traditional, and Xin Yuen,
being a generous Leo man, arranged a feast befitting a king. He ordered an
array of mouth-watering cuisines - sashimi in bamboo tray, soft-shell crabs, unagi, fragrant rice sushi, miso soup in
china teapot and buckwheat noodles dipped in cold oriental tea, eaten with a
raw quail egg. The puffer fish arrived, and pieces of fugu was sliced thinly and arranged artistically across the silver
tray, forming a delicate white floral pattern. Everything was almost too
beautiful to eat.
Again, I could not help sneaking a few peeks at Xin
Yuen as he chomped on his meal. This time, he took care to munch in a more
polite and civil manner. It was a toned-down affair compared to that great
demonstration put up by his robust appetite at the hawker stalls. This was a
tame lion now settling down in languor before a hearty meal. An almost purring
cat. Even then, I still caught myself spying a little. His mouth seemed to be
sending subliminal messages. I was careful not to stare. Does every man eat
like that? I confessed I took immense satisfaction in observing a strong,
healthy male specimen lapping up food. Is this some kind of fetish? Maybe I
should get psychoanalyzed.
As if seized by some unholy instincts, my hand picked
a slice of fugu with chopsticks and
offered it up to his mouth. “Aaaaaaaaa” I said, urging him to open up. Briefly,
I saw a look of shock on his face, before it passed and he made no attempt to
eat the proffered morsel of fish. He calmly ignored my gestures. Fortunately, I
was unfazed by his lack of response. It was not completely out of my
expectations, after all. Well, you can’t blame a girl for trying to indulge her
fetish, right? But what totally caught me off-guard was the man mimicking my
gesture, offering a piece of fugu to
me in return. Automatically, I opened my mouth and let him popped the raw slice
of fish into it, before chewing on the flesh leisurely, savouring every taste
of its cloying sweetness on my tongue.
Feeling extremely bold suddenly, I pushed another slab
of fugu to his mouth. He hesitated, as if calculating his response.
But I persisted stubbornly like the mule-headed creature I am. Reluctantly, his
lips parted to receive the juicy meat. Time to equal out the score. He tried to
feed me again, alternating between the tuna maguro and red salmon, this
time with more force like a nanny from hell. For each two spoonful I took, I
shoved down a piece of seafood into his throat. This was fast turning into an
angry feeding contest.
The bill came. It exceeded three hundred
dollars.
What a perfectly fantastic opportunity to flaunt one’s
earthly possessions. The Leo man settled the bill with a dramatic flip of his
wallet. After dispensing the silver tray, he began performing a curious
exhibition. Gleefully, he laid out a set of shiny credit cards in front of him,
a total of perhaps 20 or so Mastercards, American Express and whatnots, and
started counting them. A frown came upon his face.
“I was thinking of cutting out some credit cards.
There are way too many of them, and I have some just lying around,” he said
smugly.
Dafuq did he
just say? The cute image of a child tap-dancing on stage,
shouting “Look at me! Look at me!” suddenly popped up in my mind. Thankfully, I
was blessed with a naturally expressionless face which betrayed none of the
sentiments lurking underneath. I mustered as much nonchalance as possible in my
reply, “Oh, perhaps you should discontinue some cards if they are such a
nuisance. They do seem too many.” I don’t get it. Was I supposed to
congratulate him? Applaud him or something? The truth was, I wished he would
just choke on the puffer fish or tripped on a chair when leaving.
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